I am writing mostly because it has been a minute since we last talked. I had something to say last week, but then I forgot what it was and didn't write. It was going to be really good. I guess it wasn't that good if I can't remember, right?
I don't know though, I feel like it was pretty funny. Sometimes it's hard to come up with things to talk about with you because you're not exactly responsive, so when an idea hits me I have to write then and there, or else the magic just kind of evaporates. Gah, it was so good!
It was nice to see you on TV last night. I mean, considering what you were working with, I thought you did well. I would've liked to see you work more with the pigeons, maybe keep Betty from eating some churros, or at least from kissing super-wet-looking Henry. Maybe I don't understand the weather in New York, but he looked so sweaty the whole time, and not at all in a sexy way, but one that is more, "You need some eco-friendly deodorant that won't stain your white t-shirts because it looks like you're sweating a lot."
This reminds me. I was talking with this kind advertising lady yesterday. She came in to try and sell us some stuff that would have been cool in 2004. Blah blah. I tried to sell her a dress and some shoes, but she wasn't having it. After mildly offending me when she suggested I use one of her clients who comes into your home to whiten your teeth, she began to describe this eco-friendly deodorant idea that she had. She did not understand why it seemed that there were always stains on white t-shirts' armpits. She wants to blame it on the deodorant, rather than the sweat. I was kind of surprised when she suggested that it wasn't the sweat that was staining the armpits, mostly because I was always under the impression that it was the sweat, not the deodorant. I wanted to suggest a deodorant that actually keeps your pits for real dry, because I use the stuff but sometimes I feel a little damp. Maybe that's me. You know, in white shirts we also get some ring-around-the-collar kinds of things. I don't put deodorant on my neck, so that must not be the cause, right?
Maybe dirt oozes out of us some way. I don't know. But she was talking about creating this new deodorant and threatened that we should not steal her idea. It's all yours, ma'am.
Speaking of stains, somehow I spilled some tea on my shirt this morning. Maybe it's not the deodorant or the sweat, but it's just white clothes that attract stains. Of course, my shirt today is white. But, I am wearing an undershirt to combat the pit stains.
I can't believe I just wrote you about pit stains. I should probably go.
Jon
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